And now, a word from the prophet
It's not often I get email from a bona fide prophet. Even rarer (N = 0) does a prophet offer me a new new testament. Of course, there's a catch - you have to buy it. Now we here at Evolving Thoughts do not as a rule endorse commercial products. This is because we have no disposable income. But sometimes the Word has to get out. As a practising Pastafarian (linguini last night), I am duty bound to spread this Word, in a nice pesto sauce...
Fellow Believers,Happy FSM Day!
Our day has finally arrived! The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is at last here. Maybe not inscribed on stone tablets, but it is a book. And maybe not THE Good Book, but at least A Good Book.
Delivering His Divine Message is my life’s work, and as I’ve said before, all proceeds from the book will go toward our pirate ship fund. Because as you know, global warming is the direct effect of the declining number of pirates, and His Noodliness, while he endorses boiling pasta, is against boiling the planet. With your help, and with the sails blowing on our bad-ass pirate ship (with flags, cannons, and weevils in the flour barrels below deck), we can spread His Word and save the environment at the same time.
Remember that ours is a small boutique religion, but we have BIG ideas (some, arguably a bit al dente) and we must share this rich booty of ideas with others. Within the pages of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, you will find FSM history, helpful propaganda, scientific evidence of His existence (including the 100% verifiable fact that no one has sued any school boards about us), as well as pictures and illustrations that surely test the limits of copyright law. But as pioneers we’re not afraid of a little controversy.
Since The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster goes on sale tomorrow, March 28th is a Holy day. I encourage you to dress in your Pirate’s best—paint one of your pant legs to resemble a wood finish, maybe wear an eye patch or get a parrot, and eat some cacciatore with a side of linguine. Then, go to your local bookstore to let them know that The Church of FSM is strong in your community. I can honestly say that if everyone on this e-mail list goes out and buys the book, it will be a bestseller. That would certainly get some people’s attention.
Our future is in our own hands. And in His noodly appendage.
You can order the book online from Amazon, BN, or Powells.